Things I've Learned This Age

        Today I turned a year older. Or two years older. Or a year younger. I'm not sure. I'm confused. I'm from Korea, I guess. Technically I'm 19 years old now. But really I wish I was turning 20. But NO ONE WILL LET ME (FOOLS!) So I'll settle for staying 18 another year till I turn 20. Anyways.... I've already learned a lot about the 19 year old Sosi.

1. I'm a holistic thinker. This basically means that when I interpret (judge, decide, choose, etc...) something I see each side and figure it out as one big picture. Almost everything is in shades of grey for me. When did I become like this? IDK... Maybe 23 hours ago... This is why I contradict myself so much. I see it one way. But immediatly can see it the other way as well. Right or wrong? What's that?

2. I have amazing friends. In my younger years, [ ;) ] I complained a lot about not having good friends. But I do. I really really do. Everyone from the mystery voice-mail leaver to the best text message I've ever recieved from Blessie to my surprise party planners, Holly and Len.

3. I hate it when things don't smell good. I'm sitting in my room at my apartment. I guess no one took out the trash this weekend (I wasn't in town) so it smells worse than dead possum. I think I'm about to die. It's raining cats and dogs; yet my windows open because I can't take the stench! SAVE ME OH LORD!

4.  I have a heart for Mexico. Here's a secret... (Even though I seemed excited and passionate for Mexico, my heart was somewhere else.) But now my heart cries out to Mexico City. It yearns to be there. God knew exactly where to place me based on my gifts and eqippedness-- including my aptitude for making up words. Mexico, I'm coming! I can't wait! Wait for me!

5. I'm in love with you!

Hello MultiCultural Roots

My hair looks out of contol in this picture! I thought I'd share!

Tofo && Rice Noodles!

Today I had dinner with my Gramama! I have never had tofu in my life but I like it now. It doesnt have a flavor to it but there is definetly an earthy taste. I think I could become a vegetarian now. Maybe. Nah, red meat is too good. And of course, I love anything with peanuts and red bell peppers. We got the recipe from Simple Life Magazine, which is funny because I grew up with the subscription but never tried a recipe! So I gave this meal two thumbs up. Especially because it was the first time I've ever had quality time with my Gramama. And by "Gramama" I mean Corey Sanders. I've learned a lot from her already.
If something is not OK with you; It is NOT OK. Don't let it be OK.

HAHAHAHAHAHHAHAHAHHA.

rofl.

Abilene

i10? 83? Ballinger? Winters? 87? Mason? 283? Fort Worth????
Somehow Blessie and I made it to Abilene and back this weekend. We spent 10 hours in the car with Robin Thicke and Keith Urban. All for just 20 hours (not even a full day) of bliss with my bestfriendforever, Angela. The weather was perfect. As was the company (SixPack ABS). I wanna go back now. San Antonio is too much!
Today the weather is perfect. (See pic below) I wish I was somewhere else. Somewhere quaint. Somewhere with really good breakfast tacos and coffee. But no way am I going alone.

Su Novio?

Mi amigas son mucho mucho mucho bueno estudiar mi espanol con.
Kelsi: Su novio es Craig*????
(Peggy no se que Kelsi habla.)
Peggy: Wellllllllll. Craig es no mi amigo!!!
Kelsi,Sosi,Joan: JAJAJAJAJAJAJAJAJA!!!
Kelsi: Oh! Su novio???? Verdad????
(Peggy es tienande no divertido.)

*No, se llame.

(Mi espanol es no mucho bueno. No tengo "free translation."

TE AMO!

I'm Happy!

I'm a happy person I PROMISE!
Smile on my face. Check.
Song in my heart. Check.
Heart on my sleeve. Check.

I'm so happy all the all the all the time.
I guess my blog is just a place where sometimes I need to talk about things that do bother me.
Even my diary is sick of the sappy sweetness and over-exhilaration.
SO... I'm sorry blog. I'm sorry readers.
I'm not depressed really!!!
Look this is me today.. I'm so pleasant!

James 1:2-7
Dear brothers and sisters, when troubles come your way, consider it an opportunity for great joy. 
For you know that when your faith is tested, your endurance has a chance to grow.
So let it grow, for when your endurance is fully developed,
you will be perfect and complete, needing nothing.

Secrets Don't Make Friends

I just got "cap in your face"d.
Two more years? Really?
I figured at most six months.
I can't do two more years.

I knew you scared me for a reason.

Meesteree

I wish I could recreate this day. It was perfect.

I'm Pretty Sure No One Reads My Blog

It's kinda sad actually. I don't know what to say on here because I have no audience. I'm pretty much talking to myself. But then I fear putting certain things on here because what if someone is reading and I wouldn't want them to know that part of me. Ehhh.... Here's a poem.

I am not Hester Prynne.

My shame is held too deep into my heart,

cradled by capillaries like baby kangaroos.

Just chillin’.

Prynne’s shame is sunburned and overexposed.

On display.

Shame does not equal shameful.

Behind crossed teeth and bright brown eyes,

my sorrow hides from the light.

His face reflects my sadness.

He is jealous.

In His hands; my failure.

He weeps.

When He speaks, I move

Too slowly.

Being homesick for wintertime Alaska,

I’ve grown accustomed to damp pillows

and broken hearts.

No matter where or when I wake up

the Son is in my eyes.

Life Plans!

       As a college student, I run frantically from one "uh-oh" to the next. "Uh-oh, my alarm clock didnt go off." "Uh-oh, I forgot my umbrella at the apartment." "Uh-oh, my roomate is upset with me." And suddenly my day is gone.
       Then my week is gone. Then my month. It becomes, "Uh-oh midterms are tomorrow." This is when the perfectionist in me collides with the dreamer.
       Oh the plans I had made! 2 hours of studying with thirty minute breaks inbetween, repeat, repeat, all weekend. Should I still shoot for that A, going over every note and then (if it's not four A.M. by that time) attempt to read and retain all details in the book? Do I give up that idea and instead make sure I hit each chapter's key points, aiming for a C?
       Either way is a compromise. Neither way will be what I had origninally hoped.
       What a contrast I am to my heavenly Father. "In perfect faithfulness [He has] done marvelous things, things planned long ago" (Isa. 25:1). He doesn't get sidetracked by our everyday emergencies, though is always there to tend to our needs. He doesn't run out of time. He doesnt cancel plans at the last minute and settle for less than He had hoped.
       The Lord has blessed me as an idealist, optimist, and dreamer. He is not finished with me. It's good to know that "he who began a good work in [me] will carry it on to completion" (Phil 1:6).

And it wont be a rush job.

Who Sent Me?

I'm from a mother who sang me You Are My Sunshine everytime I came out the bathtub.
I'm from a small town with a pizza parlor called Toppings, where everyone (and I mean everyone) held theyre birthday.
I'm from a racist highschool.
I'm from John Hagee Ministries and a pair of matching ATVs.
I'm from a father that answered zebra when I asked him what the secret password was. It wasn't.
I'm from the center of multicultural USA. And by multicultural I mean Romanians.
I'm from Maggie Court. Where the boys grow up to be Airforcers and the woman, teenage mothers.
I'm from some man's rib.
I'm from racoon eyes and sniffly noses.
I'm from a father whos arms cant close in front of him.
I'm from "I want her out of here."
And I'm from an Oliver Twist sing-a-long.
I'm from friday night events, outreaches, small groups, and coreteams.
I'm from an incubator where they put strong babies.
I'm from Mexico City.
I'm from Africa.
I'm from Tilburg.
I'm from a 1998 Hondai named Judea.
I'm from the poetry of my grandmother and the despairity of Emily Dickinson.
I'm from Jesus.