A Poem: Not An Adulteress, But Still

they stripped a tree of his branch and wrote my sins in the soil
i knelt and covered the ground with my elbows
but i knew you had seen and my feeble attempts meant nothing
i wept to the dirt, asking forgiveness
and rightfully so, you skipped a stone across the creek
then the stick in my hand betrayed my actions
and i felt
disgusting.
knowing that you had witnessed me write one word in the sand.
crazy.


inspiration

You Make Beautiful Things

Soccer game @ 7

Tee ball game @ 8

Sir Morgan: work 730-330

IV leaders meeting 200-615

Sneak off to Barksdale and surprise Sir M's mama for her 50th birthday!

That was our to-do list this past Saturday.

Our to-do list on Sunday looked more like this:

Guard stubborn ornery goat from sneaking under the fence.

Drag tomato-attaching wire through garden. 

Make adorable face at girlfie. 

Sneak in a few kisses, hugs, and pictures.

Hide your jealousy of Max and Majors BFFship.

Pray to God that Charlie's sledgehammer doesn't connect with Sir M's head.

Cut wire for fixin' the fence and tying posts to the tomato-attaching wire.

Our birthday present to Mom was manual labor. 

We love her! It was great being part of what Lee does daily. 

I love dirt! It makes me think of this song...

How wonderful to reflect on how God makes us new.

Romans 6:9-11

Ephesians 4:22-24

How wonderful to get the revelation from the very stuff we're made of.

Kids Song Are Cool, But Scripture Speaks For Itself

I fondly remember cupping my pointer finger in Sunday school singing "let it shine. let it shine. let it shine." back then that meant the big-bad-devil is gonna come try to blow out my light; and im not gonna let him; im not even gonna hide it! if only i knew where i put that light. wait a second, i never had a light. how is my finger a light? does everyone else know where their light is? oh i shouldnt say anything so i dont embarrass myself. let it shine let it shine let it shine.

Now that means something completely different to me. 

It's life and death. It's the Jaws, Bourne Identity, Taken, and Saw VI manifested in everyday life.

The Bible says:
God is light; in him there is no darkness at all. If we claim 
to know Him and yet walk in the darkness, we lie. But 
if we walk in the light, as he is in the light, we have 
fellowship with one another, and the blood of Jesus 
purifies us from all sin. We know that we truly know 
God, if we keep His commands. Whoever says, 
“I know him,” but does not do what he commands 
is a liar, and the truth is not in that person. God's love
 is truly made complete if we obey Him.

So if we know Him, we love Him? If we love Him, we obey Him? 

So if we don't obey him, we don't love Him? And if we don't love Him, we don't even know Him?

No wonder the Bible also says this.
“Not everyone who says to me, ‘Lord, Lord,’ will enter the 
kingdom of heaven, but only the one who does the will of 
my Father who is in heaven. Many will say to me on 
that day, ‘Lord, Lord, I did all my deeds in your name!’ 
Then I will tell them plainly, ‘I never knew you. Away from me, you evildoers!’

Not only is our God loving and merciful but he is 

jealous (for things that capture our love) and just.

Thats scary. No. That's comforting.

Velveteen Rabbit

"What is real?" asked the rabbit one day while they were lying side by side near the nursery fender, before Nana came to tidy the room. "Does it mean having things that buzz inside you and a stick-out handle?"

"Real isn't how you are made," said the Skin Horse, "It's a thing that happens to you. When a child loves you for a long, long time, not just to play with but really loves you, then you become Real."

"Does it happen all at once, like being wound up," he asked, "or bit by bit?"

"It doesn't happen all at once," said the Skin Horse. "You become. It takes a long time. That's why it doesn't happen often to people who break easily, or have sharp edges, or who have to be carefully kept. Generally, by the time you are Real, most of your hair has been loved off, and your eyes drop out and you get loose in your joints and very shabby. But these things don't matter at all, because once you are Real you can't be ugly, except to those who don't understand." -The Velveteen Rabbit.

-----

I want real friendships, not pseudo ones.

I want to be genuine not crowd following.

I want real moments not intoxicated ones.

I want a life that has depth and meaning.

And I want to be the best version of myself I can be.

And I want to honor God in allathat.

itshard

Spring Break Is Over. Sad

The Summer Day

Mary Oliver

Who made the world?

Who made the swan, and the black bear?

Who made the grasshopper?

This grasshopper, I mean-

the one who has flung herself out of the grass,

the one who is eating sugar out of my hand,

who is moving her jaws back and forth instead of up and down-

who is gazing around with her enormous and complicated eyes.

Now she lifts her pale forearms and thoroughly washes her face.

Now she snaps her wings open, and floats away.

I don't know exactly what a prayer is.

I do know how to pay attention, how to fall down

into the grass, how to kneel down in the grass,

how to be idle and blessed, how to stroll through the fields,

which is what I have been doing all day.

Tell me, what else should I have done?

Doesn't everything die at last, and too soon?

Tell me, what is it you plan to do

with your one wild and precious life?

The first and last lines of this poem really hit me. I've got one 

wild and precious life and with that I choose 

to honor the Giver Of Life. My plan is to make good choices. 

Choices that lead to having way to much fun, making 

memories, to loving and being loved. 

My SBXI symbolized that if I do say so myself!

Sosilly: Lee you have chocolate on your lip.

Ron: Sosina, you have whip cream all over your face.

We didn't know my Mom had zoomed in the pic so close. 

Oh and I apologize for my rily eyebrows.

Unposed. In all our flamboyant sinking life-diaper glory.

Now that's a friend.

I'm not apologizing for being 20 years old and still eating 

junkfood for dinner and reading 17 instead of Cosmo.

Oh those lovely lake days.

And of course, I couldn't enjoy life without hula hooping contests at Walmart.

Chili And Cornbread

YUMMY!
Sir Morgan and I practiced our country cookin' by making Chili and Cornbread in a Mason jar. Like everything else we cook: I found the recipe; Lee had the skills to make it happen!

Here's the actual dish!

Our version:

We didn't follow a recipe for the chili. But I can tell ya, we used turkey instead of beef. The rest we just tasted and added whatever spice we decided it needed. I kept saying "it needs more earth!!!!!!!!!!!" So Lee would add some herbs from his garden. The cornbread is Jiffy brand. My favorite.

Lee stabbed and mixed the bread and chili together. I added butter and honey because I have a huge sweet tooth.

So our rendition of this deliciousness isn't all that goodlookin'. But at least we are!! ;)

[Me mending Lee's hat and Lee being a self-timin fool]

Housework

Today, while Lee did yardwork....

I played with Abbey.

While I failed at decorating cupcakes...

Lee danced around while painting.

An outfit change and a Double Daves lunch later I realized, this is my life. 

Perfect life.

He is perfect.

I'm a strong believer that most people take Psalm 37:4 out of context, 

trying to twist it to think that all they gotta do is believe and God will 

give them tons of money, 

find them a new job, 

make the hottie in class fall in love with 'em. 

So I don't delight in God's law like I should, and my desires don't usually match God's desires.

 But a man like Lee was nodoubtaboutit God giving me somethin' special.

I never had to fall in love with Lee. I just was. It was automatic.
Call it physics. Call it timing. Call it soulmates. I will call it perfection.

Oh Who Am I Turning Into

One day, I was waiting around for Lee to get off work. 

I read for two minutes. Too boring.

I considered cleaning out my car. Too lazy.

Daydreamed. Ahh just right.

But then I stopped daydreaming. And I decided to plant some petunias.

Because that's what normal people do when they're waiting for their chooch to come home.

Right?

And now I present to you... 

...the masterpiece God and I created. 

Soooo pretty and spring-ish!

I planted multi colored petunias so hopefully as the others bloom it won't be all pink. 

And then I can replant them in the ground maybe!!!

When did I become a gardener? Blame Lee.

Oh Hi Blogger, I Missed Ya

Sorry I haven't blogged in a month! It has been a FULL month! I took pictures!

Lee and I scored free tickets to see Mercy Me at the rodeo with a couple friends. 

We spent 20 minutes oohing and awwing over these fellas.

This picture accompanies everything that Breakthrough stood for. Community. Worship. 

And Christina, Billy, and I actin like fools. [Find us!]

Lee and I celebrated an anniversary. I honestly can't remember how because Lee was (out-of-characterly) spontanious. But here's a cute picture of him being manly with the disgusting Dr. Pepper 10.

My 20th birthday was a surprise party planned by my sweetheart.

It was the 2nd birthday Lee's thrown me. And my 3rd surprise birthday party in a row.

I gave my heart and soul to the Intervarsity Christian Fellowship homelessness outreach, The Soup.

I'm glad it's over because I'm exhausted! But it was oh so fun and fruitful. :] (#12)

Also, I completed number 4 off this list.I ended up giving it 

to a Goodwill donation station, because although they resell their clothes... 

100% of the profits go to homeless shelters and thingsofthelike.

Lastly, I discovered this cartoon. 

Everytime I'm online I ignore school. email. facebook. and blogger 

to follow Cardboard Colin and his friends :D

Phewwwwwwww! I hope this next month will be just as spectacular!